Today's Lesson in Advanced Math

 
Today’s Lesson in Advanced Math
Equation for Transforming Republicans

   Bush
– lies
– arrogance
– incompetence
– laziness
+ intelligence
+ English language
+ temper
+ 10 years
= McCain

Would John McCain be a better president than George W. Bush? Of course he would! But that’s setting the bar pretty damn low. Bozo the Clown would be a better president than Bush. Surely we can aspire to something more than a pulse as the basic qualification for the leader of the free world.

Just because McCain is a better PERSON than Bush doesn’t mean he’s got better POLICIES. Based on the public record, he has every intention of continuing the disastrously failed policies of the current administration, including:
 • welfare for the rich
 • more debt for the working class
 • contempt for the poor
 • continued attempts to raid Social Security
 • a foreign policy that, if anything, is even MORE belligerent
 • more money for a military that already outspends the rest of the world put together
 • no exit from Iraq
 • plenty of entrances to other oil-rich countries
 • a “good luck” attitude toward health care
 • continued erosion of women’s reproductive rights
 • continued attempts to foist Christianity on everyone at government expense
 • continued concentration of media ownership into fewer and fewer hands
 • more jobs for India
 • more Caribbean and Latin American nations for US corporations to exploit
 • fewer and weaker food, drug, health, job-safety, and environmental regulations
 • reduced enforcement of whatever pathetic regulations remain
 • rigged elections
 • fear, fear, fear, fear, fear (Maybe he’ll appoint Rudy Giuliani as Secretary of Paranoia.)
 • more high-stakes testing for public schools, until they’re ALL labelled failures
 • but less federal money for those schools (Hey, bombs are expensive! Gotta prioritize.)
 • no letup in the War on Drug-Using Americans (It’s a WAR! By definition, a good thing.)
 • extending our world record as the most imprisoned nation on Earth
 • judicial nominees who think of the Bill of Rights as optional
 • corporate-purchased science
 • et cetera
 • et cetera
 • et cetera

On the plus side:
 • torture discouraged
 • better sense of humor
 • will probably die in office
 • The far right, for some odd reason, seems to loathe him.