A Letter from the Future

A letter to your descendants in 2120:

“In response to your application to display the image of your ancestor in the National Portrait Gallery, you must know that we have very high standards for who can be honored this way. While we appreciate that your ancestor cured cancer; negotiated a lasting peace in the Middle East; discovered anti-gravity; and won the Nobel Prize, 7 Oscars, 2 Pulitzer Prizes, and the Fields Medal, we must balance that against other aspects of per’s life, and here we are horrified.

“Per was known to wear leather, eat meat, and consume dairy products forcibly extracted from captive bovine Americans. Per not only condoned the auto-torture of neckties and high heels but actively engaged in them. Per consigned wood and petroleum to the flames. Per treated the forerunners of our cybercitizens as if they were mere tools, to be used and discarded. Per supported the sugar trade. Per performed ritual cannibalism at ‘religious’ services. Per engaged in ‘marriage’ to a single other person at a time. Per regularly used sexisms like ‘he’, ‘she’, ‘man’, and ‘woman’. (Pardon our coarseness, but we must face the ugly reality.) Per consumed paper. Paper!

“Worse, on multiple occasions per deplored violence in all its forms rather than proudly promoting good violence. Worst of all, per stood for vulgar democracy instead of the benign rule of our wise Council of Elder Philosophers.

“Since it is universally recognized that the entire measure of a person’s character is the worst thing that per has ever done, you will understand why your ancestor will never be the 3rd image in our Gallery.”